Danke Erin!
Wenn ihr mehr über Erins Retreat auf Ibiza erfahren möchtet, hier entlang. Oder schreibt ihr eine E-Mail : erin@erinknowles.co.uk Das nächste findet übrigens schon vom 11. bis 18. März statt.
Erin und Matt Crowther mit Duke (2), Januar 2017
Photography: Anouk Neerings
Interview: Marie Zeisler
Hello Erin! You are originally from London but moved to Ibiza recently. What’s the story?
I love London! I lived there for 18 years. I’m originally Irish. I met my husband in London 10 years ago, he’s a born and bred Londoner. He co-owns a company called Ibiza Delivers, it’s a luxury provisioning service providing villas and yachts with fine food and drinks. We always spent long periods of time in Ibiza during the Summers, then last year we decided to make the move full-time. I had my own boutique lifestyle management (concierge) company and wanted to make a move into working fulltime in wellbeing, organising retreats and coaching. So the timing was perfect for me. Our son Duke was 14-months-old when we moved. We’ve talked about living in the sun since we got together. We wanted to bring kids up out of the city. Ibiza is a beautiful island and I can be a hippy here! No one asks what you do.
How is it to raise a child away from home?
It was a real struggle at first as we had such a good support network of family and friends in London to help with Duke. The first 6 months in Ibiza were hard work and lonely for me. We had constant visitors but that made it even harder because I was always hosting. Now bit by bit we are laying roots here and my parents are on mainland Spain, a 3 hour boat-ride away. We’re on our little adventure together as a family and we take each challenge as it comes. My husband and I are a strong team – I think you need to be to do something like this together. Living rurally means I need to be really organised and make sure that I’m stocked up with all the essentials. Amazon is a total life-saver!
Did motherhood change your attitude towards life in general and work in particular?
Motherhood has changed me. I had Duke at 34 so was very used to spending lots of time on myself and my wellbeing, it was an adjustment putting someone else first. He has made me so much more present to how precious life is and how quickly it goes by. I try to be there for him when we play, it’s so easy to be checking my phone or sorting things out around the house but it’s not fair on him. I definitely take work less seriously. I’m passionate about it but not as serious as I used to be. Being a Mother has given me a lot of confidence and I don’t worry so much. Having Duke made me sure that I couldn’t run a concierge business anymore. I had to do what is in my heart and move into working in wellbeing. I was over the rushing around sorting out last minute requests for clients and trying to juggle being a Mother at the same time. He opened my heart and all kinds of things have come from that.
How do you and your husband organize family life?
We take a real tag-team approach. We’ve set it up so he works more and I look after Duke but when he’s at home he’s a hands on Dad. I’m someone who is always doing something so that’s how we organise family life, with serious multi-tasking. I try and keep a schedule of nanny/work mornings, swimming classes, play-dates, shopping or else I’d go mad. It’s the most challenging role I’ve ever had by far.
Do you plan on putting Duke into daycare?
I didn’t feel ready until after he turned 2. Now we are both so ready for it but the nursery can’t take him until September. It’s a lovely Buddhist nursery in our local village and I hear amazing things from the other mothers. So we will wait it out with a bit of help from our amazing part-time nanny Karen who helps a few mornings a week. Having weekday mornings to myself would feel like a major luxury.
Can you tell us more about the idea behind the retreat you’ve mentioned?
In my 20’s I worked in events and then concierge. It was stressful and reactive. I was always on call for my clients who would ask for crazy things at a moments’ notice (the kind of clients who would call saying they urgently needed a treadmill for their dog!) I wasn’t looking after myself well and my immune system wasn’t coping. I got sick and ended up in A&E with pneumonia. I was 28 which is a really key age for many people as we go through something which astrologers call ‘Saturn Returns, a period of deep reflection. I crashed in every way. It felt like the worst thing that had ever happened to me. Something switched and I realized that some of my behaviors had to go. I started a wellbeing practice to get me through it and I tuned into the belief that there were universal forces at work. I was really lucky through my network to meet and work with some of the best healers and teachers in the world. Many had come from backgrounds similar to mine. I’ve spent the years since exploring and learning. I took a life coaching qualification and then went on to study foundation year psychotherapy. Now I live on Ibiza and host retreats for people who need time out. They cater for people who need to get away from their everyday lives for whatever reason, to reflect, restore, nourish, relax and rest. It can be really difficult to create a wellbeing practice whilst living in a busy city and people need this kind of support to help them build their own rituals. I love looking after people and helping them to feel better.
It sounds like you learned to look after yourself, which I think is one of the most important qualities to be a great parent. What else would you advise first time mothers or parents to avoid getting too stressed out?
I would say try to create a nap schedule as this has saved my life at times. Knowing I have set times oft he day when I am free has been completely invaluable to me. I read Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth and followed what he said (with the exception of leaving the child to cry which I can’t bring myself to do!)
Lean on family and friends as much as you can, even if it’s only for an hour whilst you go out for a walk or have a nap. I found with our family they loved to be on their own with Duke and it gave him a chance to bond with them all individually.
Duke slept with me for the first 8 months and I feel like it meant I was better rested because I wasn’t having to get up in the night to go to him. It removed a whole extra layer of complexity having him next to me, I knew he was safe.
Sometimes we’ll have a pamper morning where we fill the bath with bubbles and all of his toys. I’ll do a face pack on both of us, wash our hair and then we have a coconut oil massage. It means I’m hanging out with him and pampering myself at the same time. He absolutely loves it!
About Ibiza: What are your favorite three places for a nice family trip?
We love to hang out in the kids playground in Santa Gertrudis, I have a hot chocolate in the sun whilst Duke plays.
There’s an old pirate tower which we can see from our house. We sometimes walk there through the forest and climb to the top where there are epic views.
La Paloma is a gorgeous garden restaurant serving the most beautiful, colourful food. There’s a little play area for kids with swings and a play-house.
What the toughest about being a mom?
The lack of time I have to do things for myself now Duke’s gone down to 1 nap. I make it work though. I get up early to meditate and do yoga. And then I squeeze in some work or a quick wax whilst he naps. I always try to remember that it is such a short amount of time in the grand scheme of things and I know when he’s grown I’ll miss him being little because all mums say that.
What do you love about motherhood?
The pure unconditional love. The little arms wrapped around my neck and the little hands stroking my hair and patting my back. The constant kisses. The soft sweet smelling skin and silky hair and little toes and fingers. The constant chatter of funny nonsense. The little shirts and socks and cuddly toys. Having a reason for being that is bigger than me. Knowing that I have a best friend for life who laughs at all my jokes.
Find out more about Erins Ibiza Retreat here, or write: erin@erinknowles.co.uk .The next retreat is from March 11-18.
Erin and Matt Crowther with Duke (2), January 2017
Photography: Anouk Neerings
Interview: Marie Zeisler